ok i think i will tempt fate and take it out to drain the tranny. should i keep the car in neutral? when i take it out?
No tempting of fate necessary, just don't move the shifter is all. You put it in neutral, just remember to chalk the wheels, something you should do anyway.
IMO, unless you're in and out of the car during this process, there will be no accidental movement of the shifter. Just remember that as soon as it's drained to put the bolt right back in. Then lower the car and refill the trans with fluid. Keep in mind that it's best to fill it when it's as level as possible. 3.1 quarts is the total capacity, but since you're not completely emptying the trans of fluid you probably won't get that much in it.
When you get done, take a quick look at your old fluid. Hopefully you won't see any sparkles floating around in it and hopefully it won't have a horrible odor. Fresh trans fluid smells rather sweet to me. Bad fluid, when it's really bad, makes me almost sick to my stomach. It should be bright red in color.
Edit: I'm all for the drain plug, however an inexperienced person can really ***** a trans if they don't drill and tap the hole perfectly dead-on straight. It is because of that, that I'm suggesting to him to remove the bolt. I think there'll be less room for error in this particular case. It's a gut feeling call on my part.